Senior Living: A birthday to remember

In a recent column, fellow Postmedia columnist Liane Faulder encouraged us to have a birthday party and invite 25 people.

Well, I have hosted my own birthday party for years and this year was no exception. And it was pretty special as I celebrated my 95th birthday in July.

Cousin Bill and his wife, Cynthia, had already announced their arrival for “Aunt Alice’s” Big Day. Bill’s sister Margaret would also join us, flying in from San Diego, Calif. But I like a gathering, so I invited more people to the party. My friend Pat and another friendly couple, Mary and Chester, whom I had met at the Monkland Tennis Club, graciously accepted. I was also happy that longtime friend Lilian who had moved to Dorval, Que., on the West Island, said she would come to the party with friend Claudia. There would be nine of us at the table.

But where to have the party? The nearby Monkland Tennis Club, where I am now an honorary member, was a natural choice as I knew the people there would do an excellent job. I decided on an evening meal on my birthday and notified those invited. Of course there would be a birthday cake, created, as in the past, by Zoli the Hungarian master pastry chef. As Zoli had moved his business to the West Island, friend Lilian offered to pick up the cake and bring it to the party.

Then, as usually happens, things started to fall apart. First, the time of the party had to be moved from evening to lunchtime, as the club would have a party of its own in the evening. Then, even worse, friend Lilian fell ill and called to cancel her and friend Claudia’s attendance and to say she would be unable to pick up the birthday cake. What? No birthday cake?

And that brought thoughts of past birthday parties to mind. It has been an annual tradition of mine to invite friends to a party on my birthday. The luncheon held in the restaurant of the Hungarian Residence here in downtown Montreal. The menu would feature wiener schnitzel (breaded veal cutlets) and would be crowned by a delicious birthday cake created by the aforementioned Zoli. I looked at the seating plan for the year 2009, when there were 14 people sitting around the table. Each place was marked with a card bearing the person’s name. The birthday party guest numbers dwindled over the years, even down to four pre-COVID.

When I look at those names on past birthday luncheon lists, each name evokes fond memories. Friends like my charming neighbour Ernie; John the Inuit art collector; friends Vera, Klari and Vilma; Jeno, a fine bridge player; and other dear friends no longer with us. Others are in poor health or living in residences.

But back to this year’s 95th birthday lunch. It was on all counts a big success, enjoyed by all at the Monkland Tennis Club. The elegant table setting, with the day’s menu at each seat, the attentive service, the beautifully presented meal accompanied by fine wines, would — as a guest put it — do the Ritz-Carlton hotel proud.

True, there was no wiener schnitzel, but there were platters of charcuterie, fruits, cheeses and cold cuts, followed by a main course of grilled chicken legs with roasted potatoes and mixed greens — but, sadly, no birthday cake. In fact, a piece of cheesecake on each plate was accompanied by a single candle placed on mine. True, there was not much room for many more candles, let alone 94 counting the one already there.

But it was a wonderful birthday all the same with lots of love, gifts, cards, phone calls, flowers and emails. Some relatives were unable to come, and they were being missed. But to everyone who came or sent greetings, a big thank you.

Wishing you, too, a very Happy Birthday — whatever number you are celebrating.

— Alice Lukacs writes the Life in the 90s column